Are you having marriage problems?

The other day, when I was on an airplane flying home, I met a guy that knew about Jesus but does not worship anymore.  He was divorcing his wife.  He and his wife are both Doctors and had a daughter 4 years ago to try to solve their marriage problems.  He said, “It seemed to amplify the problems.”  I thought, “Go figure!”  I felt like he was dealing with his marriage academically.  He told me how he detaches his commitment with the legal paper that is his marriage certificate.  The net is that they thought it would be best to leave each other.

I asked him if someone held a gun to his head when he asked her to marry him?  He said, “No.”  I also wondered how he could make a promise and just give up so quickly.  He said that she cuts him down so he gave up.  She said she wanted a divorce and he said “OK.”

Please know that I am not judging him or anyone else going through this.  I told him that I’ve been married for almost 30 years and I probably couldn’t count on both hands the times my wife has felt this way about me.  We are people and this is what happens.

The more I thought about this conversation the more I think of this passage:

Do you see what this means—all these pioneers who blazed the way, all these veterans cheering us on? It means we’d better get on with it. Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we’re in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he’s there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls! Hebrews 12:1-3 (MSG)

This verse is about running the race of faith!  Jesus gives us illustrations so that we can know.  When I apply this race toward living with someone that knows me so well, I feel like I see what He is talking about.

The example of running the race, perseverance, pain, joy, etc., yields a love now that if I would had given up on I would have never known.  The love I have for my wife and family is the sweetest thing I have ever had.

Are you having marriage problems?  Are you willing to ask God for help and not pursue your own selfish desires?  Are you willing to give up your own life even if your spouse does nothing for you?  Do you trust God with all of your life?

I pray that women do not try to change their husbands but rather accept who they are!  I pray that men stop looking at things they shouldn’t, stop manipulating the weaker people, and start living God fearing lives!  Fight for your princess!!

image:  Nattu